Started our weekend fun Friday. It was the last day of the home schooling Friday Enrichment 10 week program. The kids had fun and made new friends. I taught pre-ballet, Vrndavan took the Mad Science class again. He really likes all the fun experiments they do and things they make. He also took this time outdoor games. Organized fun type games. Lakshmi took the horticulture class and art class. She especially loves art. Next year kids will join in classes at the Ackland Art Museum. I really am happy they are into the arts. Soon Vrndavan will have tabla lessons, Lakshmi and I keyboards/harmonium. Ok back to the near now- Friday night HH BKG came to our home for dinner. We were happy to have his association.
Saturday morning started out with me teaching 2 ballet classes and taking 1/2 a class while Pati (husband) took kids to Vrndavan's soccer match. After all that we headed off to Raleigh for Earth Day. I meant to go to the one at the art museum but ended up at the one at the natural science museum. The kids esp liked the magician- just a young chap but I was amazed at the tricks he pulled off. The also enjoyed the scrap craft station where they got to make things our of craft scraps= V made a rocket with a launch pad and L a purse and hat.
Saturday night was New Goloka community meeting at M Rangadevi's.










Sunday morning we took kids to local Zen Center. I drive by there often and always wanted to stop in. I looked online and this Sunday was a good time to come= they were celebrating the appearance of Buddha and it was really child centered. The people were so very nice and welcoming. Kids dived right into service there, Lakshmi and Radha with flowers decorating the palaquin that would carry Baby Buddha. Vrndavan got into cake decorating. They took the kids and parents on a walk through the forest, then played a game, then went inside to hear the story of the birth of Sydharth. They then took us into the Zendu (?) "temple "room" It was a nice wooded room with lots of windows and skylights and nice smelling. They offered really nice cushions for everyone to sit on. Then with colorful flags and banners we went on a procession through the woods again to a circle. They had all the kids/parents in the inside of the circle which I thought was so nice and organized. Then in an peaceful manner each child came up to the altar and offered some type of coal in the little fire and gave the Buddha a bath with a ladle of sweet tea. On the morning he appeared, it rained lightly and the rain was sweet like tea. Then they had a potluck. I was happy to see that it all looked like healthy vegetarian food. We invited some of our new friends there to come to the Krishna Temple and they said they have wanted to visit there.
Later we drove 33 miles for Lakshmi's Kathak dance class and back for Sunday Feast. It was the appearance day of Hanumanji too! HH BKG gave a nice class, the children love to hear his class and the way he narrates the past times. Weekend extended into Monday. There was a percussion workshop offered to the home school group.


For the first time we went to Pittsboro. It was held at a place called Clapping Hands Farm.
The kids loved the 3 mile long driveway that had big mud puddles the car kept splashing in. Nice to be way out in the country. Many people brought their own drums. I was lamenting we didn't bring the mrdanga to introduce people to. There were plenty of drums for everyone to play. The teacher than taught some basic beats, some call and responses and group rythems. Picnic and then kids got to make some instruments. Ok I am tired of writing now
over and out

Holi

Sri Giriraja and Sri Radha

Last night when I went to dress the Deities in Their night outfits I was surprisingly greeting by the 2 sweet smiling sila forms of Sri Giriraja and Srimati Radha. Thanks to HH Bir Krsna Maharaja for bringing Them here, and thanks to Their Lordships for having Maharja bring You here so we can serve You :)
Just some other random thoughts. The other day I woke up feeling sick and weak with no appetite. I rested in bed all day and it was really a blessing to be able to hear, really hear all day bhajans and classes as I was in such a quiet restful mood, not sleeping just restful. My body and mind were so quiet so I could really hear. Very purifying and great opportunity. I thought how nice it would be to do at least once a week, but unless sick I'm afraid my mind (or husband :) would accuse me of being lazy and to 'get into action' as of course there is always something to clean or do around the house!
Initially I tried to go to our temple room and I managed to chant 1 round before feeling weak and nauseous and the need to go back to my room and rest.
Around 5Pm I was feeling a little better so thought we should go outside for some warm air and sunshine as it was a very beautiful day outside. Lakshmi was pretty much resting with me all day and Vrndavan, although not feeling as weak as us, was in the room with his books hearing all the nectar as well so they were also happy to get out.
So we head outside to sit in the sun as I realize I still have at least 15 rounds to chant. Normally beginning to chant that many rounds in that later part of the day might be a big burden & chore! I was amazingly surprised that it was really good as I got into it and actually really relished the holy names. I notice that if I don't really have a deep taste for the holy names I might chant on my porch and try not to let the neighbors notice so much as they might think I am crazy talking to myself. This time was different. I was out in the middle of the yard sitting with my eyes closed and I was relishing it so much I was hoping a neighbor would see and ask me what I was doing so I could have the opportunity to share the glories of the holy name as I was personally realizing a drop of the glories of Naam then and there.
I realized also the potency of fasting. That whole day I didn't eat a thing. With my high vata I am usually not very good at fasting. I get very weak, shaky and very irritable, especially when having to perform many activities. Ths day my mind felt so clean and clear and peaceful from hearing and fasting all day. I was so grateful for the opportunity and realizations and thought how wonderful if every Ekadashi could be spent in this way.

Holi in Utah

Jaya Jagannatha

Gaura Purnima Eve here!

From http://www.krishna.com/en/node/1422
In a special appearance, Aindra Prabhu and his 24 Hour Kirtan Group traveled to Sri Dham Mayapur for the Gaura Purnima festivities and performed amazing kirtan (congregational singing of the Lord’s name). This is a video filmed at Sri Mayapur Candrodaya Mandir on March 7th, 2008.

Visit our Mayapur Webcast page to watch and listen to live Kirtans going on right now for the Gaura Purnima festival!

Snatam Kaur Concert

Last Saturday night we ventured to Winston-Salem to see Snatam sing. I am attracted to her purity, love and devotion to God . Lakshmi gave her and the guitar player, Guru Ganesh garlands that Srimati Radharani were prasad. The next day we went to our local Gurudwara for the first time to see hear her sing there too. We felt very peaceful and happy after being in her energy. It has inspired me to delve deeper into the songs of our Vaisnava Archaryas.


Lakshmi & Snatam outside at the Gurudwara


Vrndavan and Lakshmi onstage for the 'celestial communications' where the children and everyone sing and dance.
http://snatamkaur.com/

Night of Lord Siva

http://iskcondesiretree.com/portals/0/AIC/2008/08-03-06_AppreciatingVariousFormsOfKrsna(SB-7_4_30)HHKadambaKananaSwami.mp3

Just tuning into this morning's class at Chowpatty,
Appreciating Various Forms Of Krsna by HH Kadamba Kanana Swami. Wow I never heard him before- I like the way the harmonium is being played- I just know it's going to be a great class. Thanks iskcondesiretree.com!!!
It was a really good class. I looked into his website to find more classes and bhajans was happy to find http://www.kkswami.com/
interesting he is a disciple of HH Jayadvaita Swami as I was just relishing listening to his class the night before.
Below is another excerpt in glorification of Lord Siva.
Namo Sivaya

MERCY AND CHEATING
by Madhavananda das
The following article appeared in Sri Krishna Kathamrita magazine issue 7 "Lord Shiva the Greatest Vaishnava", published by ISKCON Gopal Jiu Publications.

Common people generally judge a great personality according to the qualities of his or her followers. They also usually think that the dearest follower of that personality must be the one that has received the most facilities, attention, and position from that great person. How then do we understand Lord Shiva and his distribution of mercy? Many powerful demons such as Ravan, Banasura, Vrikasura, and Sudakshina worshiped Shiva. By all appearances it seems that each of these demons were very dear to him and received his mercy. Shiva even went so far as to fight against Lord Krishna on behalf of his devotees Banasura and Sudakshina. Certainly those were signs of his mercy! Or were they?

MERCIFUL TO ALL

Lord Shiva is famous as asutosa, "he who is easily pleased". He is very easily pleased and he is very quick to give benedictions. Like Lord Shiva, his consort Maya-devi is also very free in distributing mercy to everyone, including even the demons and impersonalist mayavadis. In his footnote to Hari-nama-cintamani (7.61), Thakur Bhaktivinode comments on the nature of their mercy on such persons:

"In the material world the mayavadis worship Goddess Maya and chant her names like 'Durga' and 'Kali'. Lord Krishna's spiritual potency is His personal potency. Maya is the shadow of that spiritual potency. Gradually purifying them, Goddess Maya convinces the rebellious souls who have turned their faces away from Lord Krishna to turn and face Him again. Maya has two kinds of mercy: sakapata-krpa, mercy with cheating, and niskapata-krpa, mercy without cheating. When she gives sincere mercy, she gives to the conditioned soul true knowledge and devotional service offered to Lord Krishna. When she gives cheating mercy she gives to the soul temporary material pleasures. The limit of this cheating mercy is when she throws the soul into the state of merging with impersonal Brahman. When that happens to the soul, all is lost."

Lord Shiva has two types of mercy, niskapata-krpa, mercy without cheating, and sakapata-krpa, mercy with cheating. An intelligent person should understand the difference, and aspire for Lord Shiva's niskapata-krpa. Although it appears that Lord Shiva is being merciful to the demons when he grants them benedictions, in actuality they are not recipients of Lord Shiva's real mercy.

SERVICE NOT ACCEPTED

A good example is Ravan, the demoniac king of the raksasas. Ravan worshipped Lord Shiva, and it would seem that Shiva favored him since he granted Ravan so much wealth and power. However, Srila Vrindavan Das Thakur has given a penetrating look at Ravan's service to Lord Shiva and shown that actually Ravan did not please Shiva at all. In his Sri Caitanya-Bhagavata (madhya 10.148-149), Vrindavan Das states:

siracchedi bhakti yena kare dasanana na manaye raghunatha - sivera karana

"Ravan worshiped Shiva but would not worship Lord Ramachandra. For this offense Ravan's ten heads were cut off."

antare chadila siva, se na jane iha seva vyartha haila, maila savamse pudiya

"In his heart, Lord Shiva rejected Ravan and did not accept his service. Ravan did not know this. Ravan's service to Lord Shiva was all in vain. In this way he and his family were all destroyed."

SIVA-TATTVA IS GURU-TATTVA

Aside from being worshiped by the demons, Lord Shiva is also the guru of many great krsna-bhaktas. The fourth canto, twenty-fourth chapter of Srimad Bhagavatam describes how Shiva bestowed his mercy upon the Prachetas, by which they became great devotees of Lord Krishna. The twelfth canto, tenth chapter describes how Markandeya Rishi worshipped Shiva to get devotion to Krishna. In the Brahma-vaivarta Purana (4.13.72) Garga Muni describes himself as a disciple of Lord Shiva. He says that Lord Shiva taught him the glories of Krishna's name. The Narada-pancaratra, first ratra, chapters eight and nine, describes that Shiva acted as guru for the great devotee Narada Muni.

In his purport to Srimad Bhagavatam (4.2.2), His Divine Grace A.C. Bhaktivedanta Swami Prabhupada describes Shiva as being guru for both the demons and the devotees:

"Lord Shiva is described here as caracara-guru, the spiritual master of all animate and inanimate objects. He is sometimes known as bhuta-natha, which means "the worshipable deity of the dull-headed." Bhuta is also sometimes taken to indicate the ghosts. Lord Shiva takes charge of reforming persons who are ghosts and demons, not to speak of others who are godly; therefore he is the spiritual master of everyone, the dull and demoniac, as well as the highly learned vaisnavas. It is also stated, vaisnavanam yatha sambhuh - Shambhu, Lord Shiva, is the greatest of all vaisnavas. On one hand he is the worshipable object of the dull demons, and on the other he is the best of all vaisnavas, and he has a sampradaya called the Rudra-sampradaya."

In His Sivastakam prayers (text 7), quoted by Murari Gupta in his Sri Caitanya Carita Mahakavya, Sri Chaitanya Mahaprabhu describes Lord Shiva's position as guru, sivaya sarva-gurave namo namah - "I repeatedly offer my obeisances to Lord Shiva, who is the guru of everyone." Sri Srimad Gour Govinda Swami has also commented on this point:

"This siva-tattva and guru-tattva are the same. Guru and Bhagavan, Shiva and Bhagavan, have a very intimate relationship, priya-sakhya, a relationship of lover and beloved, premi-premastata. In that sense there is no difference between Shiva and Krishna, guru and Krishna."

In many places it is described that the guru is considered to be a manifestation of Lord Shiva. Sri Hari-bhakti-vilasa (4.139) says:

gurur brahma gurur visnur guru devo mahesvarah gurur eva param-brahma tasmat sampujayet sada

"The guru is Lord Brahma. The guru is Lord Vishnu. The guru is Lord Shiva. The guru is the Supreme Absolute Truth, therefore always worship Sri Guru with all you possess."

Narada Purana (63.121) says:

diksaya guru-murti-sthah sarvanugrahakah sivah

"Through diksa, Shiva, the giver of all benedictions, is manifested in the form of the guru."

The same point is made again in Narada Purana (65.58):

om namas te natha bhagavan sivaya guru-rupine

"I offer my respectful obeisances unto Lord Shiva, who has assumed the form of guru."

SUBSTANCE AND APPEARANCE

Siva-tattva and guru-tattva are also the same in the sense that both Shiva and guru are krsna-krpa-sri-murti - manifestations of Krishna's mercy. In Bhagavad-gita (4.11) Krishna has described, ye yatha mam prapadyante tams tathaiva bhajamy aham - "As a person surrenders to Me, I reciprocate with him accordingly." Similarly, as manifestations of Krishna's mercy Shiva and Sri Guru also reciprocate according to the motive of the worshiper. Although they are merciful to all, it's not that everyone who approaches them gets the same thing. To sincere persons they give niskapata-krpa, mercy without cheating, and to duplicitous materialistic persons they give sakapata-krpa, mercy with cheating.

Srila A.C. Bhaktivedanta Swami Prabhupada (Bhag. 1.13.37 purport) describes the topic of cheating:

"That great souls cheat others may be astonishing to know, but it is a fact that great souls cheat others for a great cause."

On another occasion (lecture, 21 May 1969) Srila Prabhupada made a similar comment:

"[Buddha] situated the atheistic people on the line of understanding God. So this is, in one way, cheating. But this cheating is not cheating. Just like a father or guardian sometimes cheats the young boy. That is not cheating; that is for his good."

The Lord's Mohini Murti pastime as described in the eighth canto, chapter nine of Srimad Bhagavatam is a good example of niskapata-krpa and sakapata-krpa. When Mohini Murti began to distribute nectar, it didn't seem that She was paying any attention to the demigods. She was seen to be smiling and casting glances only on the demons. However, while it appeared that She was favoring the demons, in actuality She was cheating them and giving all of the nectar to the demigods. In the same way, because of the attention and approval showered on them by Shivaji and Sri Guru, sometimes persons with selfish motives appear to have obtained great favor, but in actuality they are being cheated while genuine mercy is quietly being given to others.

Bahirmukha-janas, "outward-facing" persons such as the demon Ravan, absorbed in external things, are full of passion and equate receiving material opulence, position, and recognition from Shiva or guru to be mercy. However, antarmukha-janas, introspective persons such as Markandeya Rishi, recognize that the real mercy of Shiva and guru is gained when they become truly pleased. They understand that the niskapata-krpa of Shiva and guru is not manifest in external things such as receiving opulence, high position, or public shows of approval from guru and Shiva. Rather, it is in obtaining krsna-prema. Materialistic followers who approach great personalities such as Durga, Shiva and Sri Guru and with their lips cry out, krpa koro, krpa koro - "Please give me your mercy! Please give me your mercy!" while internally desiring something material, are given what they want, but are deprived of real mercy. They are the recipients of sakapata-krpa, not niskapata-krpa.

Like Lord Shiva, Sri Guru externally accepts everyone's service, and, like Lord Shiva, it is not always easy to know if he is actually pleased or not. Thakur Vrindavan Das has described (Cb. madhya 10.150):

bhala manda siva kichu bhangiya na kaya yara buddhi thake, sei cinte buddhi laya

"Lord Shiva does not reveal whether he is pleased or displeased with his servant. A person who is intelligent can understand in his heart whether Lord Shiva is pleased or displeased."

PURE DEVOTEE'S KICK

In his commentary on Caitanya-bhagavata (adi 17.154-158) Srila Bhaktisiddhanta Saraswati Prabhupada says that even the mere desire for niskapata-krpa is rarely found in conditioned souls. He says that the only hope for most is to get the merciful kick of a pure devotee:

"The community of arrogant persons will take millions and millions of births to understand Vrindavan Das Thakur's causeless mercy, so until their offenses are exhausted they will never have the opportunity to receive a kick on the head from the sanctified all-auspicious feet of a pure vaisnava. Even the genuine desire for receiving the niskapata-daya, non-duplicitous mercy of a pure vaisnava, is a rare commodity for ignorant mundane sinful people, pious fruitive workers, or mental speculators. Living entities who are averse to Hari, Guru, and vaisnava have not accumulated sufficient piety in their previous lifetimes, nor have thousands of their forefathers accumulated sufficient piety, that they are qualified to receive the all-auspicious kick from the lotus feet of the pure, transcendental, ultimate-benefit-awarding lotus feet of Thakur Vrindavan. The moment that dust from the lotus feet of a pure vaisnava will fall on the heads of sinful persons, that very moment they will become free from all material contamination and deceit and thus become proprietors of the wealth of devotional service."


For a free subscription to our email mini-magazine "KK Bindu" write to us at: katha@gopaljiu.org

or visit our website: www.gopaljiu.org

Tornado reported near Hillsborough

The Herald-Sun
Mar 5, 2008

A tornado passed through Orange County early Tuesday evening but apparently caused little damage. At 5:27 p.m. National Weather Service radar in Raleigh indicated a tornado over Efland, about seven miles southwest of Hillsborough. The twister was part of a line of severe storms moving through the county that brought heavy rain and high winds.

Please nobody else send me the following message. I already received it two times this week. I am really disappointed that devotees are distributing this with the fearful message with it. Yes the photo is very nice- thanks for the darshan, but I don't appreciate the purpose behind sending it.
My Lord doesn't operate in such a manner.




The President of Argentina received this picture and called it "junk
mail." Eight days later, his son died.

A man received this picture and immediately sent out copies. His surprise
was winning the lottery.

Alberto Martinez received this picture, gave it to his secretary to make copies
but they forgot to distribute it. She lost her job and he lost his family.


This picture is miraculous and sacred, don't forget to forward this within 13
days to at least 20 people.

Do Not Forget to forward and you will receive a huge surprise!!



*DISCLAIMER STATEMENT*



*Confidentiality Warning : This e-mail and any files transmitted along with it are for the sole use of the intended recipient(s) and may contain confidential and privileged information. If you are not the intended recipient, you are hereby notified that any review, re-transmission, conversion to hard copy, copying, circulation or other use of this message and any attachments is strictly prohibited. If you are not the intended recipient, please notify the sender immediately by return e-mail, and destroy the original message along with all copies of the same and any attachments, from your system.

Jaya Gaura Nitai! So happy we have the technology to visit so many temples and hear so many nice classes from the saintly persons. The photos above from ISKCON Mayapur and Vrndavan and the video from San Jose, CA were taken on Sri Nityananda Trayodasi. Jaya Nitai!

Lord Nityananda Festival

We narrated the story of when some thieves made various plans to steal the jewels of Lord Nityananda. Poorna played the part of Lord Nityananda, Lakshmi and Radha played associates of Lord Nityananda.

Parth and Vrndavan acted as 2 of the theives.




Vidura, Jayananda and Narada Muni acted as guards guards of Lord Nityananda. Radha acted as the goddess Nidra that made the theives fall asleep.



The head brahmana thief realizes that Lord Nityandana is the Lord and he begs forgivess, the Lord blesses them, and then Haribol Haribol! Kirtan!
Everyone was swept up into the lively kirtan. I couldn't even stop to get my camera, this photo was taken by Damodara Priya. Then of course the festival was concluded with a sumptuous feast.

The Story of Stuff

The video can be seen at:
http://www.storyofstuff.com/

Hankering & Lamentation

I am lamenting that I am not in the fire of Krsna Consciousness. We have been watching some festival videos for the past couple of hours! From Youth Bus Tours to Mayapur festivals and in between.
How I would have loved to be involved in big dances and dramas glorifying Prabhupada and Krishna and sharing and introducing so many souls to our Dear Lord.
I often have felt somewhat disconnected within ISKCON. I was not fortunate to join in the wonderful days of when Srila Prabhupada was here- to have been included in greeting His Divine Grace at an airport, to be in class, or to have seen HDG dance at a festival, (thankfully we have the videos and books!). In those days, EVERYONE was in the fire.
Although I was born in 1967 I am not a Gurukuli. I didn't come in contact with ISKCON until 1991. Although many of the Gurukulis have suffered so much in the past with all the preaching and touring activities the bliss is hopefully replacing, or outweighing the pain in their hearts from the past and they are having fun in KC and I am so happy to personally witness 1 Gurukuli who was covered in a period of darkness to now be bright face and so happy and serious about chanting and spiritual life.
So here I feel stuck in the middle. I haven't even been to Mayapur yet and I am married to a Bengali devotee now for 13 years!!!???!!?? When will I be able to tour the holy dhamas in the association of sadhus???
When oh when will I be able to participate in these glorious festivals in the holy dhamas? I feel like I am missing out so much and why-
I am lacking the mercy and the money.
I want my children to be drenched in the bliss of KC memories. They won't have big Kuli Mela festivals to see all their many friends- there currently is no Gurukula. In the past there were some bad ones, but now there are practically none, at least not in the states. Here I chased a dream moving across the USA so my kids could grow up in the association of devotees and have a gurukula. No such luck. Today we went to the temple, it was afternoon on a Saturday and there was a home program some 20 miles away, but while at the temple I only got to see one devotee. We went mainly to have darshan, chant some japa, circumambulate the temple as it was a sunny warm 66 degrees and have some caranamrta. I don't make it to the temple much aside from Sundays and darshans and classes via the computer these days. It was nice not to be in a rush and how nice it really wouldv'e been to see devotees.
I can never get to the festival of inspiration in New Vrndavan bc it is always the 2 weeks before the performances where I work- why can't they do it during spring break when a lot of people have off????
Here we are on the east coast and I have never even made it to NY Ratha Yatra. On top of all this lamentation I feel bad that I want to ENJOY. Is it wrong to desire to want to ENJOY KC- it is a joyful process right? Esp in the association of enthusiastic devotees. I really do relish our day to day KC activities, chanting 16 rounds, offering arati/kirtan every morning and evening, reading Srila Prabhupada's books, hearing classes, ect... it has been a peaceful process, but I too want my kids to be in the fire of KC in the association of devotees, not just peaceful boring old me. There used to be a handful of children at the temple morning program here. The schedule is not so conducive with children- whole program in finished at 7:30 so most kids are off to school anyhow.
I hanker to visit the different temples and communities, befriend and serve the Vaisnavas around the world like Hungary, London, NZ, Australia, South America, and of course India!
Ok I am going to stop my pity party now- Krsna is so kind I have faith that He will fulfill our hearts desires to serve Him, eventually in due course of time. I really am grateful for the service I have and the nice devotee friends I have- I am happy but I guess I am seeking more than happiness- I want bliss. So Now let's focus back to what Krsna wants and not what I I I I want!

First Snowfall

We had our first snowfall of the winter (and hopefully the last) a few weeks ago. Too bad I have grown old and no longer like the snow like I did when I was a child with lots of fun, sledding, ice skating on frozen ponds and lots and lots of playing in the snow. Of course we couldn't do much of that here in NC anyhow. I am glad my husband went outside with the kiddies to play while I hid in the warm house.
I wonder if it snows all kinds of (warm?) colors in Goloka for the pleasure of Krsna and the gopis to play in afterall, everything here is reflection...